BiblicalInsights.net

     Allison Bottke has written a good book on setting boundaries with adult children.  The book deals with adult children who are not being responsible for their own lives.  She uses an acrostic to present her message:  S-A-N-I-T-Y.  Some of the main thoughts she presents are as follows:
     S-     STOP.  Stop your own negative behavior. 
              1.  Enabling behavior.
              2.  Ignoring your own personal problems.
              3.  Being alone in your pain.
              4.  The flow of money.
     A-     ASSEMBLE.  Assemble a support group.
              1.  Self-help support groups.
              2.  Professionally run support groups.
              3.  Online support groups.
              4.  Codependent support groups.
              5.  Six-step SANITY support groups.
     N-     NIP.  Nip excuses in the bud.
              1.  I’m just too tired.
              2.  But mom, things are different today.
              3.  You just don’t understand.
              4.  I’ll start Monday.
              5.  It’s not my fault.
     I-     IMPLEMENT.  Implement rules and boundaries.
              1.  We are responsible to each other and to ourselves.
              2.  Responsibility and accountability are important.
              3.  You reap what you sow. 
     T-     TRUST.  Trust your instincts.
              1.  Trust whenever your gut tells you something is wrong.
              2.  Trust whenever your spiritual perceptions are alerted.
              3.  Don’t fail to listen to your conscience.
     Y-     YIELD.  Yield everything to God.
               1.  God is in control.
               2.  God is present with us.
               3.  Trust God and His Word.  God has answers.
               4.  God is greater than any enemy who would destroy us.
   (see the book by Allison Bottke, Setting Boundaries With Your Adult Children).  The message of this book may help you manage irresponsible adult children in a scriptural manner.